Stephen Colbert Reminds Us to be Kind. Not Nice.
And we should take care to never confuse the two
Stephen Colbert isn’t going anywhere. Sure, his show is ending, and the circumstances of that departure are, let’s just say, complicated.
But Stephen?
He’s more than a just late night host and, as a result, can’t be cancelled like one. He’s a proven entity, a public figure who visited us each night with insights about the world from a perspective all his own.
That, on its own, isn’t new. His contemporaries are aligned in that way, as were many of his predecessors. But, arguably more important than his ability to feed us our daily diets of important information through the guise of a well timed joke, Colbert offered something more. Something distinct.
Stephen Colbert never confused being nice with true kindness.
To be nice risks sacrificing progress for the sake of calmer waters. To be nice is to risk elevating a dangerous opinion for the sake of “playing fair.” Niceness is the hidden enemy of progress, because it disguises compromise with a forgiving smile.
Colbert never forgot that. Instead, he showed us what true kindness looks like.
True kindness is generous. In that way, Stephen Colbert’s kindness shined most when he was interviewing a guest. There are hundreds of strangers in the audience, countless lights flooding the stage, but when a guest sat down to talk with Stephen, they seemed at ease — like it was a chat with an old friend.
I think his past improv sensibilities instilled a finely tuned gift for active listening, and Colbert’s quiet patience left space for guests to settle in and find a rhythm.
True kindness is also self-assured. To be kind is to stand up for something you truly believe in, even if it risks criticism or consequences. Stephen Colbert is a vocal critic of this current administration, and he’s become a voice for countless folks who might not otherwise see themselves on television.
True kindness is considerate.
This is what makes me appreciate Stephen Colbert so much. His kindness extends beyond the assumed limits of a late night talk show. He speaks openly about his grief, having lost his father and two brothers when he was just ten years old.
As someone who lost her father a few years ago, that kind of loss is impossible to shape into words. But, Colbert found space and time to let that grief in, and by talking so openly about his journey it made mine feel less isolating.
I think that part of his lasting legacy will be how he’s associated with The Lord of the Rings, and how his passion for the series shaped him (especially in the immediate years following the loss of his father and brothers). He found refuge in art, and those books afforded him the space to escape and discover a path forward after such loss.
When others might have fallen into quiet rage (an entirely valid feeling when faced with that kind of grief), Stephen Colbert, instead, turned toward his empathy. His pain has transformed into something beautiful, and his kindness will be felt long after the last echo of laughter at the Ed Sullivan Theater.
Stephen Colbert isn’t going anywhere, because Stephen Colbert has managed to leave a lasting impression that exceeds what any late night talk show can normally offer. He’s a man shaped by grief, guided by sturdy principles and now defined by his kindness.
Stephen Colbert is this country’s Samwise Gamgee, and we could all learn a thing or two from them both.